an opportunity for complaint that is seldom missed

I’d like to think that I’m patient and accommodating. But there are places where I draw the line. Pet peeves. Namely, names.


I find myself quite irritated by names that seem to be made up of two or more pre-existing names. Compound names, if you will.

Sharolyn. Is it Sharon? Or Carolyn? You pick.

Danaya. Danielle? Or Maya?

Shawna. Shawn + Donna? (This name makes my mouth open like a seal waiting for a fish to be tossed in it.)



Less offensive in the names category are ones that people seemed to make up and that do not feel normal rolling off of my tongue.

Dawnn. Am I supposed to hold the “n” sound? [*This name may fit under the following category as well.]

Dona. (Pronounced DOUGH-nah.) No. It’s either Donna or I don’t talk to you.



And I’ve given up the battle against spelling a normal name in an abnormal way. It was uphill.

How many different ways are there to spell names? Well, with my name alone I have witnessed at least half a dozen.









I’m sure you could continue the combinations until they were all used up. And don’t get me started on Katie, Amy, or Ashley. If you wanted your child to stand out, perhaps you should not have given them a name that every other girl will have.


In regards to pet peeves about my own name, please call me by the proper name. Yes, technically my legal name is Rebecca and if you are family or know me in a professional setting (i.e. my doctor), I’ll answer to it. However, please do not call me Becky. There is only one Becky Church and she is not me. While I love her, the only things I have inherited from her are her full name (see previous) and her blue eyes.


Thanks for listening to my rant. I’ll offer you another crown in heaven… if I’m allowed to and if we both make it. No, I kid. I’ll be there.


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