a weighting game

So I know I’ve been MIA in the blog realm lately, I’m sorry if that upset you. 😉 Sometimes I find myself in a lighter space and willing to share about my life and the goings on. But lately life has felt a bit heavier and I wanted to let it settle before coming back here. It’s never my goal to complain or pout, and I found myself watching my words, especially lately, so that I’m not doing those things. I am learning so much. So much more than I want to, to be honest. But as my dear sister described it, God is using everything and everyone in my life together to create a beautiful patchwork quilt. Only a most loving and creative God could transform these pieces of trash that I insist on clinging to into a uniquely formed patch in the quilt of my life.

It is too much to think about. I’m closer to being able to truly understand the phrase “the weight of glory.” I’m feeling the weight of life. Of my position before God. The weight of the gifts and passions he has given me. The weight of the frustration of not being able to realize those passions.

The heaviness of being human.

That is my mental picture of life these days. I’m glad God made me a visual learner (and paired me with someone who is not) because I feel satisfied spending time pondering these things even though I lack words to describe them.

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